Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Clarity, Content, Coaching.....

We all have dreams, aspirations, and desires to be something larger than current life. Whether it is personal or professional, we want to be more for ourselves and those around us.


Getting a handle on those dreams, holding them high and setting a course for making them come true seems to be where many of us begin to grind to a painful halt. That creates a sense of failure and causes aspirations to be shelved labeled as too big, unachievable, or simply….out of reach.


There is nothing better than the sense of fulfillment when one of these grandiose ideas comes into reality. You can only imagine how someone like Barack Obama must feel when he gets a quiet moment to sit back, reflect, and smile, yes smile about his dream coming true. He dreamed he could be President and with a lot of help he achieved it. It is the kind of smile you can actually FEEL.


How do people like you, me, and Barack achieve these kinds of dreams? We need help. Someone to guide, direct, and channel those thoughts and help us to create a strategic path. There are never too many dreams, just not enough plans. This is where your Coach can come into play. They listen, record, learn, and understand what it is you want to achieve and then work with you to establish a specific, time lined path to success. They drive you to believe, hold you accountable to achieve, and their success is grounded in arriving at your biggest outcomes! Coaches live to help others achieve what they have always wanted to do and don’t feel complete until YOU have done everything you thought possible.


Some call them mentors, some call them friends, some call them Coaches. Whatever you call them find someone to help you write down your dreams and let them help you bring them to life so that you too can FEEL your next smile.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Leadership - Born or Created?

Now here is an age old debatable topic, “Is great leadership born or created?”

I understand why some believe great leaders are born as it just seems that some of the best managers, leaders, and owners that I have come to know over the years just seem to “get it”. No matter what the situation, they seem to know the proper response, get the social cues, can adapt to quickly changing emotional issues and tie it all together with great business decisions to finish off their own brand of top notch leadership.

Now for my answer……they are CREATED! I believe it is simply a matter of environmental genetics. Great leadership is taught by role modeling, coaching, business experiences, and the daily addition of wisdom and maturity. Listed below are some simple tactics (not all of them) for developing your own leadership skills and being recognized by those around you as one of the greatest!

Find a mentor – Who is the person you most admire currently? Contact them directly and share your desire to learn from them. Anyone that you admire that much will surely put you under their wing and help you along the path that you desire. Identify the values or behaviors that you most admire about your mentor and have them help you on a path that will add those behaviors to your leadership style.

360 degree evaluations – Talk to the people that currently work with and for you. Tell them about your desire to be an exceptional leader and that you need their feedback to improve your leadership. Now develop some questions that will best elicit the responses you seek. How about some to get you started:

1. What’s it like to work for or with me?
2. Do I provide you with opportunities and coaching to improve your own talents?
3. If there was one thing I should keep doing, what would it be?
4. If there was one thing I should stop doing, what would it be?

As you listen for the responses, SHUT UP, take notes, and listen as if your own mentor was giving you this feedback. Your peer or subordinate has a perspective and their perspective is reality…no matter whether you think they are right or wrong. And last, actually do something with the information you learn and change or improve from the feedback. Others will see you make the changes and be much more likely to share honestly with you the next time you need direct feedback.

Read, Read, and then read some more – Just an hour in your local bookstore or online bookstore searching through the business section, self-help, or management section and you are bound (no pun intended), to find some books that strike your current focus or thoughts. Do you hate reading? Try CDs for those long car rides or iPod downloads for your workouts. Need some titles? Ask you mentor about some titles that have stimulated them the most. Think of reading business and leadership books the same as a doctor reading the current medical journals. You have to stay current and constantly “Sharpening the Saw” as Steven Covey says. Hey, maybe you just found your first author to check out!

Engage in social networking – post your questions and thoughts on social networking sites to get others to give you some quick feedback. I have met some of the smartest people on these sites and many have helped me to solve some of my toughest issues.

Leadership isn’t born, it is created! The best news is that tomorrow is another day to improve your skills, engage those around you, and be the best leader you can be to your co-workers and employees.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Listen to learn, not to defend

One of the skills we should all take time to be better at everyday is listening. Many opportunities pass us by each day when we don’t engage in “active” listening. There is a positive benefit to be gained from everyone you interact with on a daily business especially in your career or business. In the competitive world of business, people occasionally view listening, learning, and changing as a vulnerable or weak value. Some would say, well if I don’t stand up for my position or prove my point, I will get walked on or miss the next big chance. Every person you engage with achieved the level of their current position with an attribute or skill that is worthy of understanding!


So slow down, look the person in the face and listen. Close your mouth and open your ears. Slow your mind down and really try to understand the message that is being given to you. Set aside proving the idea that is coming out of the other person’s mind is wrong or needs corrective coaching from you. When engaged in active listening, practice these mental behaviors:
What is the outcome of this conversation? Are you here to learn something, be sympathetic to a plight, or help solve a problem – ask the person talking to you which one it is – this will give you a better foundation to listen from.



What is the topic?

Why does the subject mean this much to the person delivering it?

How can I better listen to understand what this person means?

Validate points back in the conversation – what I hear you saying is….. Then the person talking to you can determine if you are getting it and agree or reframe the discussion to present it better for you

Ask for specifics when the discussion gets off course or “tangents” away from the outcome you discussed at the beginning

And, if you just can’t keep your mouth shut…..take pen in hand, scratch pad and take notes about what the person is saying. This will force you to hear and capture the message.

So………listen to learn and not to defend



When you become a truly great listener, you develop a “mentor” quality that attracts people to you.

When you become a truly great listener your relationships, both personal and professional, become deeper and more satisfying.

When you become a truly great listener, your quality of life improves.

When you become a truly great listener, you learn from others, and this is where the best ideas come from!